According to "a teacher", in her note, my poetic license should be "waived" and I don't know what the heck that means, but it REALLY pissed me off. I asked a lot of people what that meant and they said, well, she's questioning my writing skills. I told you, I'm not a good writer. I just write what I feel. It just gets to me. Airra kept telling me she just wanted me to be "better" but seriously, I feel suckish for the matter. As far as I'm concerned, I just did this because I was told to, no harm done. Besides, it's quite hard for me to grasp a certain subject I'm not really familiar of [P.S. I just write love poems. hahaha.] so yeah, here's the poem [that people won't know that I wrote] that will be in the JS invite.
Not final yet-
Dearest Seniors,
The beauty of tomorrow
lies within the remnants of yesterday
Time ticks away to the beating of our hearts
But the memories we've made-
good or bad,
Will never cease to part, forever
There's a long wide road stretched in front of you
Full of challenges and choices to make
So take each one, make your mark
and someday you'll see
the beauty of every
step you have trod on.
Together we build our bridges
as we soar high to posterity
we spread our wings so wide
and hold on to each other
Never fearing the bitterness
of pain,
And seeing happiness
through the future's dawning.
Our greatest gratitudes to you
for opening our eyes to the world
making us feel safe in your presence
and never leaving us behind.
Thank you for the times
when friendship grew within us
And the moments we've established-
they would never turn to ashes
nor dust.
As you go ahead of us and travel through
the destiny
that lies in the paths you are to take
See no fear and seek the light
for we are here
standing right behind you.
Living on the legacy you've left
found within the walls of
our beloved alma mater
Always remember that
you must live your dreams.
Let nothing bring you down
for strength is found within
every one of us.
Be ready to aim high
to fly across the wings of success
and to take flight
beyond the horizons
of your being.
The Juniors
1.25.2009
1.24.2009
closed doors
There's just a big wide wall between me and criticism. It's so drastically frustrating me every single second of my life.
Some people might say, you do learn from criticism, and I do agree with that but sometimes I feel like falling overboard with the drastic comments I've received throughout my whole life. Especially about my physical appearance, but that's not the thing here. They are the most painful ones that never escaped my thoughts. Even the times when I was growing people kept on talking about me negatively. As if I am that bad! I may fall, yeah, but I am not open to it. Besides I think I've fallen too many times already. My first 2 years in high school was a big pain to me because I had to fall apart and tear myself into pieces to get to where I am now. Corny or exaggerated as it sounds but everyone does know my sensitivity and I am not capable of wanting people's comments on my works either in art of literary context. Okay you can comment but do it in a nice way gad. You don't have to use over the top DEEP words and have me interpret it literally, I even asked my classmate to tell me what the heck it means. And it hurt so bad. Hello noh I just came home from Ateneo, overstressed, uber tired, drawing my ass off for only 2 hours! But it was fun. So I took a nap when I got home, super relaxing, then I eat dinner, and next thing I know this is what I see.
GREAT.
I'm still unsure whether she* hates me or not but, I don't hate her. I am simply disappointed of myself that's why I blame it on other people. I'm not very good at defining myself, really, because I usually derive my own perception of my self-identity with the things and stuff people tell about me, that's why I'm easily prone to vulnerability. And I'm not skilled much in writing. It is simply a habit I do often - I write blogs, journals and random thoughts. It's just interconnected with my artistry. As an artist, I tend to explore a lot about things, I'm very [yes, very] observant. If you think I didn't see you just because I am probably talking to a person or doing something, think again. I may have blurred eyesight but my vision is perfectly fine. And I didn't have any formal education on writing, I was just influenced by someone way back in firstyear.
That did make all the difference, I'm very fortunate to have met him for that.
Unfortunately, and ironically, I am suffering because of my writing skills.
Great.
I hope I'd be able to open my doors to hate and critiques. Maybe I'm just making a big deal about it because one of the top things I get from drawing is constructive criticism. Well, except in school. People adore my stuff, but my friends are the best critics. Esp. Kristin. She can make my heart sink in just a fragment of her criticism. But at least it's for the better. Hay.
I need to rest for a least 8 hours. I've been seeping for only 5 hours and 3 hours. My goodness.
I did have a fun time even if I lost in the art contest. Haha. The judenites were super spportive of me and super driving me to do the best in the competition. For me it was nice. Good conceptualization for an impromptu artwork. Just that mine is, as always, my favorite word, DETAILED, and well, you know, old people, they hate seeing those [except some of my teachers haha they like it] and old people were the judges, and they're so dumb [not for picking me, i dont care] for picking the STEREOTYPE winners of these friggin' contests.
Someday I am going to be an art critic. Wee :) Arts was my highest in the vocational testing yesterday that had me almost turning into a dumb idiotic freak after that test. Hahaha. It was agony all in one.
Anyways, it felt good doing my best. I just could've done better if there was more time, maybe 4 hours instead of 2 hours :) I'm too slow :)) But cutting classes was worth it.
Hindi ako magsusulat ng siao khai! YAY! :)
:D
Currently *calmed* at the moment. Thanks for the advice people. Dami niyo nagcomfort hahaha.
[takes a deep breath]
I can breathe well now. xD
Some people might say, you do learn from criticism, and I do agree with that but sometimes I feel like falling overboard with the drastic comments I've received throughout my whole life. Especially about my physical appearance, but that's not the thing here. They are the most painful ones that never escaped my thoughts. Even the times when I was growing people kept on talking about me negatively. As if I am that bad! I may fall, yeah, but I am not open to it. Besides I think I've fallen too many times already. My first 2 years in high school was a big pain to me because I had to fall apart and tear myself into pieces to get to where I am now. Corny or exaggerated as it sounds but everyone does know my sensitivity and I am not capable of wanting people's comments on my works either in art of literary context. Okay you can comment but do it in a nice way gad. You don't have to use over the top DEEP words and have me interpret it literally, I even asked my classmate to tell me what the heck it means. And it hurt so bad. Hello noh I just came home from Ateneo, overstressed, uber tired, drawing my ass off for only 2 hours! But it was fun. So I took a nap when I got home, super relaxing, then I eat dinner, and next thing I know this is what I see.
GREAT.
I'm still unsure whether she* hates me or not but, I don't hate her. I am simply disappointed of myself that's why I blame it on other people. I'm not very good at defining myself, really, because I usually derive my own perception of my self-identity with the things and stuff people tell about me, that's why I'm easily prone to vulnerability. And I'm not skilled much in writing. It is simply a habit I do often - I write blogs, journals and random thoughts. It's just interconnected with my artistry. As an artist, I tend to explore a lot about things, I'm very [yes, very] observant. If you think I didn't see you just because I am probably talking to a person or doing something, think again. I may have blurred eyesight but my vision is perfectly fine. And I didn't have any formal education on writing, I was just influenced by someone way back in firstyear.
That did make all the difference, I'm very fortunate to have met him for that.
Unfortunately, and ironically, I am suffering because of my writing skills.
Great.
I hope I'd be able to open my doors to hate and critiques. Maybe I'm just making a big deal about it because one of the top things I get from drawing is constructive criticism. Well, except in school. People adore my stuff, but my friends are the best critics. Esp. Kristin. She can make my heart sink in just a fragment of her criticism. But at least it's for the better. Hay.
I need to rest for a least 8 hours. I've been seeping for only 5 hours and 3 hours. My goodness.
I did have a fun time even if I lost in the art contest. Haha. The judenites were super spportive of me and super driving me to do the best in the competition. For me it was nice. Good conceptualization for an impromptu artwork. Just that mine is, as always, my favorite word, DETAILED, and well, you know, old people, they hate seeing those [except some of my teachers haha they like it] and old people were the judges, and they're so dumb [not for picking me, i dont care] for picking the STEREOTYPE winners of these friggin' contests.
Someday I am going to be an art critic. Wee :) Arts was my highest in the vocational testing yesterday that had me almost turning into a dumb idiotic freak after that test. Hahaha. It was agony all in one.
Anyways, it felt good doing my best. I just could've done better if there was more time, maybe 4 hours instead of 2 hours :) I'm too slow :)) But cutting classes was worth it.
Hindi ako magsusulat ng siao khai! YAY! :)
:D
Currently *calmed* at the moment. Thanks for the advice people. Dami niyo nagcomfort hahaha.
[takes a deep breath]
I can breathe well now. xD
1.23.2009
anxiety?
Before it was depression. Now it's anxiety.
What's next? Schizoprenic? Most probably.
My number one dilemma is this contest thingy in Ateneo that I joined last year (2008 Feb) and here was my entry (from my old blog)
If you want to ask how our contest in Ateneo went, well, another conclusion: SJ students are not art-inclined. Or rather, SJ students are only good in other art, except OIL PASTEL art. X) At least we got a free coupon for buy 2 take 1 coffee at a nearby coffee shop. And kwento-ing with Ghia, and not taking the CEM, and drawing "Eternity", and visiting a nice college filled with college people, in which we looked like aliens O_O Plus, free pansit! Ahaha. Yum ^__^ Not to mention my mom & I passed by Lyric [music store] and inquired for guitar lessons this coming summer [Jean & I] wooh! I'm thinking I will enjoy this summer. Wooh!
Well yeah. So I lost out of 10 artists. Only 10. Only because I don't know how to use pastels.
Guess what, this year I am joining again. And I did it for my own revenge. Personal revenge. I don't know. I just wanted to prove myself that I am not that dumb in art...
But I don't know, I'm too worried to lose AGAIN. I've lost so much. :(
And other stuff to worry about, I'm making this poem-thingy for prom and I've read the one written last year. NAKAKAINGGIT :( Whoever wrote it was so....good.
Grrr I am definitely feeling a bit, no, a lot of inferiority right now.
Wish me luck tomorrow, and I hope it's worth cutting Chemistry and lir Shr classes.
What's next? Schizoprenic? Most probably.
My number one dilemma is this contest thingy in Ateneo that I joined last year (2008 Feb) and here was my entry (from my old blog)
If you want to ask how our contest in Ateneo went, well, another conclusion: SJ students are not art-inclined. Or rather, SJ students are only good in other art, except OIL PASTEL art. X) At least we got a free coupon for buy 2 take 1 coffee at a nearby coffee shop. And kwento-ing with Ghia, and not taking the CEM, and drawing "Eternity", and visiting a nice college filled with college people, in which we looked like aliens O_O Plus, free pansit! Ahaha. Yum ^__^ Not to mention my mom & I passed by Lyric [music store] and inquired for guitar lessons this coming summer [Jean & I] wooh! I'm thinking I will enjoy this summer. Wooh!
Well yeah. So I lost out of 10 artists. Only 10. Only because I don't know how to use pastels.
Guess what, this year I am joining again. And I did it for my own revenge. Personal revenge. I don't know. I just wanted to prove myself that I am not that dumb in art...
But I don't know, I'm too worried to lose AGAIN. I've lost so much. :(
And other stuff to worry about, I'm making this poem-thingy for prom and I've read the one written last year. NAKAKAINGGIT :( Whoever wrote it was so....good.
Grrr I am definitely feeling a bit, no, a lot of inferiority right now.
Wish me luck tomorrow, and I hope it's worth cutting Chemistry and lir Shr classes.
1.20.2009
the right roads
The past days have been...weird. I have tons to worry about and despite its uselessness I still manage to ponder over it :( Bad.
First of all, I can't believe my teacher knew about *insert name here*! I even asked him over and over and he was like, "Well diba last year you had a fight?" Uh, what? Did we fight? Let's just say there were some realities that I needed to know [which I did, lately, that pained me to hell] that stopped everything. Since we did the Mending Wall activity and since he thought my work was really, really nice [well it is for me cause I made it x) yabang noh?] he called me FIRST! Arghhhh. It was really embarassing because I did draw me, my cousin [*shh. she doesn't know] and ahem, the other guy. So yeah. Then I "explained"...blah blah blah...but then when I went back to my seat Mr. Rillo was like, "who's this [yung guy]? __________?" How the hell did he knew??
BTW dejavu at the moment.
Ack I didn't even know that he knew. It was really frustrating because the whole class heard. GAD. But, anyways, during Computer Class Daph was talking about it and it felt worse. Not that I blame Daph, haha ok lang sakin. I needed to know at one point what things are becoming and up to. I'm just not brave enough to face a part of me that I've been shutting down for so long, am I? It's just that I can ease away from it [according to Daph, phobia -partially true] but when I see it the effect is worsening to me. Besides, I'd rather not talk about it. It's just over-frustrating me. I've been living a better life now. So much better I guess.
Also during the class there were lots of girls [comp lab] so we all talked about prom dresses and stuff. Ahhhh! Daming magviviolet!!! x( And ofcourse the #1 color is blue hahaha. But I was so creeped out and scared someone might have the same gown as mine 'cause I just bought it :O Help me relieve my anxiety on this thing! It's too petty a problem but I kept thinking about this for 2 whole days now >___< I tell you, it's not a good feeling. hahaha. Grrr. I hope it will be gone and I am crossing my fingers no one would wear the same gown as me! xD *crosses fingerssss*
What else...I miss drawing! But the homework trauma is getting on my nerves. I had my whole aura drained awhile ago after having Hua Won test [but I did think it was easy, i studied days before] and surprise test in Trigo [shocking. really shocking. at least walang class. boring sobra!] and surprise GE in Chem [kailangan perfect! i failed one of the GEs :( ang bobo ko mali yung Molar mass. my goodness!] hay...so tiring! SO I need a break. But I hope I will get that break some time. I hope.
About the wall thing, it just makes me feel sad and I always [yes, always] wonder if I could've chosen a different path to take on. Rewind back to 1st year, hmm. What if I didn't go online....last....August 2006 some Thursday in that month? I could've not known anything about * and we would not have talked for 7 hours and I would still have a normal life and a balanced lifestyle but then, if I didn't then I wouldn't have fights with my friends and befriend new friends whom are still my best friends right now. What if... I didn't have to sit beside him in the first mass of 2nd yr and end up agonizing over the fact that the feelings I had for him is already killing me to hell death as each day swings by... I wish I could redo everything, but then again, things happen. One turn leads to another. Despite me happy with how things are now, in a way, regret is something that will never leave my vocabulary. Never.
Sometimes the right road just leads us to something better. And I do hope that is the case, for me, right now.
First of all, I can't believe my teacher knew about *insert name here*! I even asked him over and over and he was like, "Well diba last year you had a fight?" Uh, what? Did we fight? Let's just say there were some realities that I needed to know [which I did, lately, that pained me to hell] that stopped everything. Since we did the Mending Wall activity and since he thought my work was really, really nice [well it is for me cause I made it x) yabang noh?] he called me FIRST! Arghhhh. It was really embarassing because I did draw me, my cousin [*shh. she doesn't know] and ahem, the other guy. So yeah. Then I "explained"...blah blah blah...but then when I went back to my seat Mr. Rillo was like, "who's this [yung guy]? __________?" How the hell did he knew??
BTW dejavu at the moment.
Ack I didn't even know that he knew. It was really frustrating because the whole class heard. GAD. But, anyways, during Computer Class Daph was talking about it and it felt worse. Not that I blame Daph, haha ok lang sakin. I needed to know at one point what things are becoming and up to. I'm just not brave enough to face a part of me that I've been shutting down for so long, am I? It's just that I can ease away from it [according to Daph, phobia -partially true] but when I see it the effect is worsening to me. Besides, I'd rather not talk about it. It's just over-frustrating me. I've been living a better life now. So much better I guess.
Also during the class there were lots of girls [comp lab] so we all talked about prom dresses and stuff. Ahhhh! Daming magviviolet!!! x( And ofcourse the #1 color is blue hahaha. But I was so creeped out and scared someone might have the same gown as mine 'cause I just bought it :O Help me relieve my anxiety on this thing! It's too petty a problem but I kept thinking about this for 2 whole days now >___< I tell you, it's not a good feeling. hahaha. Grrr. I hope it will be gone and I am crossing my fingers no one would wear the same gown as me! xD *crosses fingerssss*
What else...I miss drawing! But the homework trauma is getting on my nerves. I had my whole aura drained awhile ago after having Hua Won test [but I did think it was easy, i studied days before] and surprise test in Trigo [shocking. really shocking. at least walang class. boring sobra!] and surprise GE in Chem [kailangan perfect! i failed one of the GEs :( ang bobo ko mali yung Molar mass. my goodness!] hay...so tiring! SO I need a break. But I hope I will get that break some time. I hope.
About the wall thing, it just makes me feel sad and I always [yes, always] wonder if I could've chosen a different path to take on. Rewind back to 1st year, hmm. What if I didn't go online....last....August 2006 some Thursday in that month? I could've not known anything about * and we would not have talked for 7 hours and I would still have a normal life and a balanced lifestyle but then, if I didn't then I wouldn't have fights with my friends and befriend new friends whom are still my best friends right now. What if... I didn't have to sit beside him in the first mass of 2nd yr and end up agonizing over the fact that the feelings I had for him is already killing me to hell death as each day swings by... I wish I could redo everything, but then again, things happen. One turn leads to another. Despite me happy with how things are now, in a way, regret is something that will never leave my vocabulary. Never.
Sometimes the right road just leads us to something better. And I do hope that is the case, for me, right now.
1.17.2009
never-mending walls + curious.
There are just some things in life that are completely inevitable. Like seeing someone you would risk everything not to set eyes on that person, or listening to the defensive words of someone taking over your house, or even the endless assignments leaving pressures on students.
I cannot escape all of them, unfortunately.
UGH.
BTW I just came home from watching The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and wow. It's super contemplative and so surreal. And it really opened my eyes to like, accept life and the road one takes. Just wow.
And not in the mood to write today. Sort of weird.
I cannot escape all of them, unfortunately.
UGH.
BTW I just came home from watching The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and wow. It's super contemplative and so surreal. And it really opened my eyes to like, accept life and the road one takes. Just wow.
And not in the mood to write today. Sort of weird.
1.16.2009
EX hausted.
This is by far one of the busiest days I've ever had.
Not now. We only have 3 assignments. 1 done. 2 more to go.
Teachers kept subbing so all we did was to write, answer seatworks, read, write effin freakin summaries, write, listen, take tests, take GEs, write, answer.
It's so sick!!!
And I got my card. *Sighs* I thought I wasn't going to go into 85 for English. Thank you sir!!! Speech kasi eh. I have high grades in ENG. Just not Speech. Speaking is not my thing AT ALL. And as always, last na naman sa honor... I am so ironically dumb. It's just that my mind doesn't function that brightly than others. Aww. But despite this I feel somehow hopeful and looking forward to the future days...sarcastically, perhaps? IDK. Hahaha.
I have been sort of quiet since Nix went to Taiwan but I have been talking to other people in the class so that's good. I guess. Hahaha.
I am just plain tired now of getting a filthy piece of intermediate and doing hell lots of seatworks and activities. SO SICK OF IT.
And Chem is killing me. Grrrrrrrrr. >:( Stupid 1-10 questions!
Not now. We only have 3 assignments. 1 done. 2 more to go.
Teachers kept subbing so all we did was to write, answer seatworks, read, write effin freakin summaries, write, listen, take tests, take GEs, write, answer.
It's so sick!!!
And I got my card. *Sighs* I thought I wasn't going to go into 85 for English. Thank you sir!!! Speech kasi eh. I have high grades in ENG. Just not Speech. Speaking is not my thing AT ALL. And as always, last na naman sa honor... I am so ironically dumb. It's just that my mind doesn't function that brightly than others. Aww. But despite this I feel somehow hopeful and looking forward to the future days...sarcastically, perhaps? IDK. Hahaha.
I have been sort of quiet since Nix went to Taiwan but I have been talking to other people in the class so that's good. I guess. Hahaha.
I am just plain tired now of getting a filthy piece of intermediate and doing hell lots of seatworks and activities. SO SICK OF IT.
And Chem is killing me. Grrrrrrrrr. >:( Stupid 1-10 questions!
1.15.2009
aww:)
Nix gave me a CD's worth of memories full of random pictures from my 2nd-3rd yr life. Super nice :) Although I have some of them ;)
1. Fieldtrip 08. Though it was not that fun, I did enjoy. And ate so many pastillas de leche! x))
2. Fieldtrip 07. F4L + Seatmates! One of my favorite memories.
3. Brother Sun Sister Moon. will miss Andrea. :)
4. Teachers' Day 08. Yesh. My fans! That's me agonizing in pain [getting a grip of the liquid is painful] doing one of my classmates' mask for FREE. I had no service charge :(
5. Teachers' Day 08. Free period Filipino. So we took pictures :)
6. PTC Day 07. Yes. That was me before. When life was so much "easier" [in terms of studies, NOT lovelife. It's much better NOW than BEFORE :)] and we were still all vain & stuff. Can't believe how much I've changed! x)
:)
Li Shr sucks. So does Chem. I am tired! Thank goodness I took a nap awhile ago.
1. Fieldtrip 08. Though it was not that fun, I did enjoy. And ate so many pastillas de leche! x))
2. Fieldtrip 07. F4L + Seatmates! One of my favorite memories.
3. Brother Sun Sister Moon. will miss Andrea. :)
4. Teachers' Day 08. Yesh. My fans! That's me agonizing in pain [getting a grip of the liquid is painful] doing one of my classmates' mask for FREE. I had no service charge :(
5. Teachers' Day 08. Free period Filipino. So we took pictures :)
6. PTC Day 07. Yes. That was me before. When life was so much "easier" [in terms of studies, NOT lovelife. It's much better NOW than BEFORE :)] and we were still all vain & stuff. Can't believe how much I've changed! x)
:)
Li Shr sucks. So does Chem. I am tired! Thank goodness I took a nap awhile ago.
1.14.2009
sweet sixteen?
My birthday horoscope thingy:
Born today, you have what it takes to attract attention wherever you go, for you are alluring, compelling and seductive -- and you know it. What you lack in subtlety, perhaps, you more than make up for in daring and courage; you will do things that others shy away from, and you will do them in a way that is not likely to be soon forgotten. Some may think you are merely narcissistic, but the truth is that you know what you want, you know how to get it, and you do so again and again.
There are times when your machinations cross the line into clear-cut manipulation -- which, of course, is just the kind of manipulation that doesn't work very well, because others know you're doing it. It is at these times that you must stop, take a step back, regroup, and form a new strategy.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
WTH I am not seductive and stuff [eww.] Anyways so much for that. I'm just interested in reading my horoscope thingy. I don't know why. I have this thing for psychic and magical insanity. Haha. Don't ask x)
I'll just update you on my "birthday" :)
Every time I celebrate my birthday, it's always different, like there's a twist on things. Which is weird but, seriously, birthdays would be boring without unexpected happenings.
BTW Thanks to all who greeted :) Even the simplest greeting made my day - I mean it :) Haha. The simplest things never fail to touch my heart [aww] and I even got short & sweet texts from people plus long dedix from my "best" cousin Jean and some gifts from my close friends - which, BTW, were all AWESOME gifts! Haha. Wala lang. Nahyper :) I even got a gift from Zhu lao shr X) So much for being an angel in her class. It pays ^^
But, overall, I'm extremely happy today :)
Except there are a lot of homeworks :(
And Li Shr officially sucks,
And so does Chemistry.
Hahaha.
Thanks again to everyone :D
P.S. New layout. Opted for a cleaner look.
P.P.S. Cannot wait to watch The Curious Case of BB! xD I don't care if there are HWs or whatever. Basta.
:)
Wednesday January 14, 2009
Born today, you have what it takes to attract attention wherever you go, for you are alluring, compelling and seductive -- and you know it. What you lack in subtlety, perhaps, you more than make up for in daring and courage; you will do things that others shy away from, and you will do them in a way that is not likely to be soon forgotten. Some may think you are merely narcissistic, but the truth is that you know what you want, you know how to get it, and you do so again and again.
There are times when your machinations cross the line into clear-cut manipulation -- which, of course, is just the kind of manipulation that doesn't work very well, because others know you're doing it. It is at these times that you must stop, take a step back, regroup, and form a new strategy.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
WTH I am not seductive and stuff [eww.] Anyways so much for that. I'm just interested in reading my horoscope thingy. I don't know why. I have this thing for psychic and magical insanity. Haha. Don't ask x)
I'll just update you on my "birthday" :)
Every time I celebrate my birthday, it's always different, like there's a twist on things. Which is weird but, seriously, birthdays would be boring without unexpected happenings.
BTW Thanks to all who greeted :) Even the simplest greeting made my day - I mean it :) Haha. The simplest things never fail to touch my heart [aww] and I even got short & sweet texts from people plus long dedix from my "best" cousin Jean and some gifts from my close friends - which, BTW, were all AWESOME gifts! Haha. Wala lang. Nahyper :) I even got a gift from Zhu lao shr X) So much for being an angel in her class. It pays ^^
But, overall, I'm extremely happy today :)
Except there are a lot of homeworks :(
And Li Shr officially sucks,
And so does Chemistry.
Hahaha.
Thanks again to everyone :D
P.S. New layout. Opted for a cleaner look.
P.P.S. Cannot wait to watch The Curious Case of BB! xD I don't care if there are HWs or whatever. Basta.
:)
1.13.2009
new beginnings, i hope
I'm turning sixteen tomorrow! Weeeeee :)
Finally. I get to leave my boring 15 YO life! x) Let's just hope my life would be far more interesting after I get a year older. lol.
Happy birthday to meeeee :]
Finally. I get to leave my boring 15 YO life! x) Let's just hope my life would be far more interesting after I get a year older. lol.
Happy birthday to meeeee :]
1.11.2009
happy-go-lucky
It's so unlikely for me to feel contented at this point, but as my senses can prove it, my life in the future days is definitely going to be a hell of a ride.
I hope not, though. hahaha.
Anyways, so much for that, I haven't started studying! I had fun drawing awhile ago, and I really enjoy my surrealistic concept of Valentine's Day - okay, not really interested in it, but I do have good ideas for artworks during this season [my last VDAY one is one of my best works - the heart thingy with the guy&girl :)] so yeah, I hope this will push through. I hope.
3 more days until my birthday! wee!
Hope all my wishes come true, material speaking and nonmaterially.
And I want to watch The Curious Case of Benjamin Button! Maybe on Saturday. My post-birthday thing. Hahaha. I can't live without going out at least once a week. If I didn't do that I would be dumb enough to know nothing about what's up with the world around me.
BTW, whoever is stalkker93 - you are WEIRD. Hahaha. And I mean it. Someday I'll know who you are. Basta parang guy eh xD
XD
I hope not, though. hahaha.
Anyways, so much for that, I haven't started studying! I had fun drawing awhile ago, and I really enjoy my surrealistic concept of Valentine's Day - okay, not really interested in it, but I do have good ideas for artworks during this season [my last VDAY one is one of my best works - the heart thingy with the guy&girl :)] so yeah, I hope this will push through. I hope.
3 more days until my birthday! wee!
Hope all my wishes come true, material speaking and nonmaterially.
And I want to watch The Curious Case of Benjamin Button! Maybe on Saturday. My post-birthday thing. Hahaha. I can't live without going out at least once a week. If I didn't do that I would be dumb enough to know nothing about what's up with the world around me.
BTW, whoever is stalkker93 - you are WEIRD. Hahaha. And I mean it. Someday I'll know who you are. Basta parang guy eh xD
XD
1.09.2009
blame it on YOU.
I didn't realize I haven't written this new year.
Anyways, it's not off to a good start, thank goodness my optimistic level is higher than usual.
I did cry, the other day, no matter how petty it sounded, it still broke my self-esteem.
I can't believe I hated myself for one day because of some ruthless teacher.
Anyways, just wanted to write about something I RARELY talk about nowadays.
I have NO IDEA, why I don't draw anymore. Not that I have to do it all the time, but I haven't fixated my skills that much for almost 6 months now. And I really think it's because I am not inspired at all. Before kasi, because of *ahem* [youknowho] there was another feeling of both happiness & sadness which I could magically express in my works. It may look colorful at first but the B and W traces make it seem so complicated, as what my life was before.
I just can't get over the fact that just because I have "closed" my doors to him and i end up not doing any freakin piece of art at all.
I blame him for that :(
That's really, really, really weird.
Oh, speaking of weird, I was just asked to join the cotillion - WHAT?
Well, of course, me being scared to break a leg dancing, declined. I can't dance.
Haha. No, seriously, it was because I already have a dress.
I know, bilis noh? I'm too lazy to go have my dress done. Twas just off the rack. Pretty decent anyway.
And uh, speaking of bilis, I'm turning sixteen in a few days.
GREEEEEAAAAAT.
It's one of the birthdays I don't look forward to - awkwardly.
Hope it makes me feel much better about myself. 'Cause sometimes I still see my flaws as a person. But whatever. No time to emo-ishly think of those stuff. I'm pretty much busy because I spent yesterday and today watching TV and laptop-ing because! I'm so sick of schoooool. Really sick of it. I wish it was over like snap.
But what are we to do, right? I hope I could endure 2 more crazy busy hectic painstakingly annoying hell months.
good night / day . it's 45 minutes past midnight. :)
Anyways, it's not off to a good start, thank goodness my optimistic level is higher than usual.
I did cry, the other day, no matter how petty it sounded, it still broke my self-esteem.
I can't believe I hated myself for one day because of some ruthless teacher.
Anyways, just wanted to write about something I RARELY talk about nowadays.
I have NO IDEA, why I don't draw anymore. Not that I have to do it all the time, but I haven't fixated my skills that much for almost 6 months now. And I really think it's because I am not inspired at all. Before kasi, because of *ahem* [youknowho] there was another feeling of both happiness & sadness which I could magically express in my works. It may look colorful at first but the B and W traces make it seem so complicated, as what my life was before.
I just can't get over the fact that just because I have "closed" my doors to him and i end up not doing any freakin piece of art at all.
I blame him for that :(
That's really, really, really weird.
Oh, speaking of weird, I was just asked to join the cotillion - WHAT?
Well, of course, me being scared to break a leg dancing, declined. I can't dance.
Haha. No, seriously, it was because I already have a dress.
I know, bilis noh? I'm too lazy to go have my dress done. Twas just off the rack. Pretty decent anyway.
And uh, speaking of bilis, I'm turning sixteen in a few days.
GREEEEEAAAAAT.
It's one of the birthdays I don't look forward to - awkwardly.
Hope it makes me feel much better about myself. 'Cause sometimes I still see my flaws as a person. But whatever. No time to emo-ishly think of those stuff. I'm pretty much busy because I spent yesterday and today watching TV and laptop-ing because! I'm so sick of schoooool. Really sick of it. I wish it was over like snap.
But what are we to do, right? I hope I could endure 2 more crazy busy hectic painstakingly annoying hell months.
good night / day . it's 45 minutes past midnight. :)
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