thankful

I'm so glad I'm still alive today (: Good morning! It's 27 minutes past 12:00 as I'm typing this, and apparently this day wasn't very productive as such. Homeworks have been piled up, project deadlines have been moved, disruption of classes will be prominent next week.

Yay?

So the Filipino thingy got moved to September 19th, and I didn't realize it was still three weeks away! I can calm myself which is good. Other assignments will officially kill me. Today I have finished redesigning the Scratch Club Shirt & writing Calligraphy. (I didn't study Chinese History! *scream*!) Very few accomplishments.

And tomorrow we're heading to Tagaytay Woodlands and I have just memo-ed 4 out of 9 Q & As aka Wen Ta :( So I ought to do my best. So I can maximize my stay in Tagaytay - but I am taking this with me; I need to do an essay.

Aw let's just do some T2DO. Life is better with it :)

T2DO:

• Answer Calc. OMG I couldn't help not sleeping awhile ago. Everyone was very tired today. *school life woes*
• Study everything about Chi History. Test on Tuesday. The horror.
• Do a 200-word essay about anything. Aw this is hard - anything is a wide subject. :(
• Edit some write-ups.

Hmm. Not much - I've cancelled the ones that were still due on Wednesday :) Too lift up my spirits. I'm such a busy gal but my emotional aspects are quite stable these days. Which is undoubtfully good :> No more nostalgic depression.

BTW I found a pretty decent layout for my blog. When time comes and I have a good idea I'll make my own. Watch me! (: Errr...Under construction.

Some new things I experienced today:

• Our Chinese teacher reprimanding us. Wow that was a first. I remember yesterday my teacher embarrassed me - it was horrible. TYVM to you. I even cried.
• Took a pic w/ Charm w/ her Baby Holga. Cute :3
• Exercising the weirdest exercises during PE.
• Nearly sleeping during Calculus. Sorry, I'll try not to!
  
• Eating dirty ice cream in the CR. hahaha! x)
• Buying an ice cream in cup rather than cone (MINI STOP haha)
• Wrote Calligraphy very early. And Pet Soc-ed when I say I wouldn't x)

Oh well, I'm tempted to go Pet Soc for a few minutes and doze off. 8 hours = 9am?

Good night/day/midnight! :)

xo.

preoccupied.

I've posted a Dear Dumb Diary entry on Tumblr, check it out: CLICK:)

Oh btw if you feel like procrastinating and hating the world right now, listen to Paramore's Ignorance. SHUCKS I am so hookedddddddddddddddddddddd :3

Moving on, I'm supposed to write a T2DO list that will be lasting for 3-5 days until Monday, Aug 31 but I thought I'd write about my notebook addiction - oh wait, I'll reserve that for the next entry.

I don't take it as a problem though, I'm quite kuripot when I buy things, so I don't buy a lot at the same time. I have to decide LONGGG :D

T2DO:

• get a good layout from blogskins ('cause I'm sick of mine. ha ha ha.)
• study Chinese History tomorrow until Monday
• take a picture of my notebook collection and classify it (it's a lot. i'm excited to post about it! :>)
• do the headings for the four parts of the Filipino scrapbook
• edit write ups
• assemble everything and bring them to Tagaytay
• pack for Tagaytay (Sunday)
• browse my closet for cool outfits I've never tried
• ask people for more playlist suggestions
• finish updating my "all about me" portion of Gazette
• finish updating Gazette before I head to Tagaytay
• ask allowance from mom (I spent a lot on scrapbooking stuff today.)
• get good night's rest every night to avoid drowsiness and spots on teh face.
• be all ears during class hours. except if i get the lesson :)
• plan for Sept. 4 - gimmick w/ F4L
• plan outfits for Fair - 2 outfits for 2 days
• take lots of pics in Tagaytay! and Fair!
• look forward to next week and hope it will not suck and i will have an awesome time

Well I don't know what else is up. But I want to do these stuffies. Aww.
xo.

I'm holding on to the day that I can be really free to do things I wanna do. But I doubt that day will ever come.

Not on my side.

Everyone's not on my side today.
Or I'm just having a mental complication at this very moment.
You decide.
xx

It's sad to feel very alone in one's own thoughts. Though I am fond of contemplating myself, nothing hurts more than thinking how things that have been far behind, and I've never thought they'd still come back and haunt me.

Over and over again I get the same kind of treatment from my conscientious mind - I emote, I get happy and so PR, I think, I become random, I turn into a nerd, I shut myself up, and make myself be rational again. That's probably how my mood works, excluding the fact that I hate being pressured when time is not at the essence. So unfortunately my brain cells right now are half-functioning, half-deteriorating. I feel very drained right now.

So today we had our NCAE. I had a good sleep every time I finished taking a test x) I probably was the fastest in the class. It was...so-so. I was just glad we were dismissed at 2 pm and I visited the library to look at Chimes. I love the old ones they're just so vintage. [@ the Learning Resource Center]

Any ways...then we went to Coffee Nook and I had some meal w/ F4L and it was fun I guess. Erm but I wasn't really in the mood today so that was kinda not good; a signal perhaps. Then when we went out I turned around to see - I HATE BEING OBSERVANT it sucks i swear! and some kind of awkward state of mind banged my head for that second.

Oh great it never went away from that time until now.

I opened a cabinet here in my mom's room which was chocfull of magazines, boxes (of random stuff) and books. I stumbled upon a box which contained my Grade 6 pictures (a.k.a. when i look skinny & malnourished & YOUNG) only to find two round shape pieces of paper that have dedix and duh, realized it was from our 1st yr project Genesis of My Life and I kept it in my Gazette. But it was kinda weird though 'cause those words written there from two people, seem so far from today. Anyhoo I went to the other room to open my Grade 6 & HS 2 boxes (I have 1st yr pics in an album, and an old Nike box lol) and saw another nostalgic item - an identical box to my bigger box, with a ribbon and some note inside which I thought I lost. Gah. The chills.

Why do some memories withstand the test of the longest time...ever?

It's hard telling this to my friends 'cause they've probably gotten sick of me saying his name over and over and over again like a 'sirang plaka' and retelling stories about those days when I felt so...i dont know but it sucks. Even I myself am sick of feeling this way, like some kind of depressant injected into my body and paralyzing my euphoric happiness. It's not that I'm saying my happiness level has reached its extremities, but really, I don't know, too, how I depict a happy face when I'm really so different at home. I usually grab a pen, get the laptop, type continuously, or study. Grrr I don't even know what else to type after this. I'm supposed to do Filipino, but look ma, more pressure. This life is not really cooperating with me.

And so I ask, WHY?

I will leave you guys hanging for this entry, for my words won't come out so easily today.
I haven't even wrote Gazette in ages!

xo.

Forever is over.

It's been what, days since I last updated? Well luckily I've decided to write a few of my thoughts tonight. It's 10, I'm not sleepy (probably 'cause of the caffeine this a.m. lol) and I'm partly studying Chinese, which I really hate 'cause I don't get it x(

Anyways, days have been pretty crazy lately, or so I always mention "crazy" but, I don't know, I see myself as a better person these days, probably 'cause I'm more liberated w/ my own free will and right now my mind is very much creatively working. But then the only word that comes to my mind when I think about art is vintage. Goodness I've been addicted.

Okay let me begin my oh-so-long entry.

August 22 was announced a no-class day 'cause, well, the very horrifying thunderstorm the night before has probably made Manila drench in flood. Well we weren't affected with that though ;D So I spent a few hours browsing over Science books and notes. And got out of the house. Wee :D Eastwood Mall for a change. Finally got some Red Mango :) But I was pretty heart-healthy 'cause I got greentea/original swirl and Muesli which is some kind of oats & trail mix. Ah well it's delicious :) And bought this Bohemian vintagey top from Bayo which is a place I rarely buy stuff. Though it's kinda expensive I will share it so, no biggie :D

So much for that. I'm supposed to be scared 'cause the next day was the USTET. NOT. well I was anxious to be late. I was in touch from the time I left home 'till I got there w/ Ghia, Nix & Joyce and they all arrived earlier! Gad. So I walked briskly w/ mom from A.H. Lacson Ave. to Benavides Building, unaware with the long line of examinees who were going to take the same test as me. Thank goodness for Ghia! Made singit singit. Okay fast forward to when we were sorta running and heading to the room. I went to room 219 and a lot of people were screaming, "ABI!" (hello - the power of joyce's voice can light up other voices lol) and I looked around only to find half of the people in the room were my batchmates :) Weeee. The test was...so-so. I just had a headache 'cause I couldn't answer when I haven't eaten in 5 hours! x( So I gorged on a Fully loaded meal right after the exam :D No kidding! But lol it was from our Reunion w/c I wasn't able to attend so they brought some for me. Yay :) Whatta test. Headache to the max. All of my studying days before hopefully paid off. I'm crossing ze fingers! *

The next day was very drowsy for me. I just remember I was really sleepy during Physics & math class that I swear to study hard for those subjects lol. Erm...oh yeah I didn't have RJ w/ me :( Someone stole it :( Haha kidding it was taken home. I missed it x)

*FYI who/what is RJ? I have no name for my random journal so I call it RJ but I kinda hate the name RJ so I plan to change it by maybe translating it to a different language lawl.
Ooh I found one. Journal in Italian is termed as "gazette" so I'll name it... Gazette :> LAWL.

Okay, I wasn't able to update my Gazette 'cause a lot of people wanted to read it! Which kinda pissed me off (unless YOU know what my life story is all about) 'cause I have a lot of private stuff in it, including photos, notes, letters, randomness which is very very confidential. So I'll not bring it to school from this day on - I have considered it PRIVATE forever. Although TYVM for the people who said it was cool :D 'cause I find it a really weird journal of a frustrated artist like me. lol.

On the bright side I'm happy to say that I might produce a public journal yay :) Just random things that I'll update per month. And! Maybe 3-4 pages per month of total randomness but I'm still thinking of a creative routine that will work out. And show off my creativity - this means I don't want it looking like artwork, more of snippits scrapbook-like w/ a bit of vintage - really addicted to vintage. Viewed lotsa Flickr stuff about Moleskine and I am soooo jealous! Those people are really cool :> I wish I was. Aw :(

Any way...I'll be doing that when time will set its standard to mine. That will be a long time lol.

Today is pretty awesome. Aside from having our fashion show this a.m. (view TwitPic for some pics or my Multi. :P ) I had fun making some noise w/ my seatmates haha. Which is cool 'cause everywhere I turn it's either I get a good laugh, a sensible talk, or both ^^ Nice. Unlike my last seat (1st Qtr) I was rather quiet and acting all "ooh secretary nerd freak" sorta thing. Hah. People are probably shocked I'm very un-kind when I am at home. I'm just not rulebreaking in school - well I do talk sometimes and usually get reprimanded for it so I just obey ze rules for my own benefit. Hahaha.

What did I ... oh, right! Skipped first Physics period to go Guidance Counseling. It was cool, 'cause all Ms. Acosta said about my Personality is so true. I AM an introvert (yeah my EQ is very low! Wah >< I can't handle my emotions well - as you all know) and I forgot the others but, I did get very high in Arts (DUH) and Business (ooh!) and my career options include Graphic Designing (weeee!!!) Managerial stuffs && marketing (it said fashion lol) so I'm really happy about that. :D

Right now my current concern is getting this Hua Wen studied and done. Wah it's 10: 48 x( I hate it! I sleep late again. But I stayed for Scratch today soooo...yeah. Grrrr. Any ways, I'm going to doze off.

Some random stuffs:

• Wed (tom) - NCAE = room buddies w/ F4L weeeeeeeeeeee :>
  
• Fri - Hua Wen test. WAH. Maybe Filipino brainstorming? (When the hell will we submit this! I have hardly enough time!)
• Sat - will hopefully watch The Time Traveler's Wife w/ D & S but I'm not sure yet, still on hold; if not, will study Li Shr
• Sun - Mon - TAGAYTAY Wee. I am so stoked for this because I will get to update my art & gazette there and hopefully fill a page of holy Moleskine-ness. I'm scared to use the God of all notebooks x)
• Tues - Li Shr test. Must study.

Speaking of notebooks I'm planning to buy another one! (I'm really addicted. GREAT) in Fully Booked! Aaaaah love that place. And I love notebooks. Ever since Grade 5! Wah. So I saw this one with Van Gogh's painting on it and it's hardcover and magnetic lock and PLAIN inside! *Squeals*

LOL. If i have the money I would purchase all the notebooks I see each time I go to a certain place. If only. Right now I only have the P1000 I got from YMCA which I will never spend. I still have to think. :D

Anyhoo so much about notebooks. Am loving BLG's Love Drunk! 'Cause I'm not love drunk anymore :P xD I'm pretty much happy living w/o something like love. It's too complicated AND I didn't really know what I've gotten myself into, you know. So I'm on a clean slate right now.

A very clean one. Like a sorta replenished soul of some sort. Hahaha. But I still get the nostalgia but, it's very rare thanks for that :D

Ohwell I gtg. Good night! Wish me luck for teh NCAE tom! Let's hope my IQ of 107 (YEZ. it's very low!) will work tomorrow morning. Must not forget to have a cup of tea. (addict!)

xo.

Do-nothing Day

I feel like doing nothing today. Woop - I gotta continue studying a few Math problems & head on to Science. An hour from now, maybe. :)

The rain last night really creeped me out. I was not happy. But I am happy now that there's no school :>

BUT.

I still have to:

• Take a bath (it's hot now)
• Update journal - Thurs & Fri events
• Research on what Penelope will say ~ lol
• Do other templates & begin doing write ups
• Study Bio & Chem, and my other homeworks :)

I am currently:

• drenched in sweat sitting, tweeting, facebooking, pet soc-ed
• listening to Taylor Swift's You Belong With Me - 'cause it always plays on Myx, MTV or [V] ah well, i love that song. and Lucas Till. ha ha ha :>
• feeling the air 'cause we rarely open the window. just today.

I cannot wait for:

• August 30 & 31 - no classes! :)
• Sept. 4-7 - hopefully we'll squeeze in a gimmick day, + Fair 100
• October - Sem Break - ABROAD!!! :D lolness.

The randomest entry everrr.
:)

xo.

/Waiting for the day you would wake up and find that what you're looking for has been here the whole time./

Brain drain

Having a crash course for 2 hours in Math is actually bloody. My mind is still adjusting. I have answered 120++ questions involving Math, will probably answer more later, refresh my mind w/ Calculus and head to sleep.

Science pa! Maybe tomorrow night. gah! The USTET is on Sunday!! Why am i cramming x( Well not really. I'm just planning to review Bio & Chem for Sci, my mind is still fresh w/ Physics and I do know a lot of Science.

Complete ditching of English huwatda :))

Anyhoo I am having some kind of break time Pet Soc-ing, chatting & stuff~

Not much of a day. 3/4 of the day I studied.

xo.

travel + adventure = UP! + other randomities :>

I want to quote what my mom said in Fookyien: "Lan kha nan khi tsut kok le!" which means it was like we were shopping in a different country.

Well it's typical for mom to say that, considering she rarely goes to SM North Edsa, The Block & The Annex. In fact, we live kinda near there but we don't go. Shangri-La's usually our "home mall" since I've grown from a kid buying at Gingersnaps to a Zara window shopper and a faithful National Bookstore buyer in Shang. Haha lol.

We watched UP today! Wee~



in Disney Digital 3D as well.


Left house at 3 (designed Scratch shirt, sketched stuff favored by people, did random stuffs) headed t Northedsa, late for 3:30PM showing, bought 5:35 PM instead. P300 for 3D. I know. But worth it! Headed to Northedsa afterwards. National Bookstore. duh :> I didn't buy ! lolness. headed to Papemelroti to buy scrapbooks, notebooks etc w/ my P500 allowance. hahahaha :) Shopping spree. Love that place! Bought vintage stuffies :)


Speaking of notebooks have I mentioned my Moleskine arrived yesterday? I avoid touching it x)


Hmm. Walked around. Feet hurt. Watched UP. Awesomeness. there was a short film shown before that, entitled, "Partly Cloudy" all I can say? CUTE! and Awesome graphics.


*worships Disney PIXAR animation studios*

If given the chance, will work there someday :D


Watching the movie was cool. Hello? 3D! :)) laughing all the time. Russell's super cute! And the overall story of the movie was well-written and the graphics were simply stunning. By far this is the most innovative and creative movie Pixar has ever produced. But I also like Finding Nemo, Meet The Robinsons etc :D

Walked afterwards. Bought this Dulce De Leche ensaymaditas and they're delish! And Chef Tony Dark Chocolate Popcorn. First time to buy Chef Tony ~ a lot of firsts today! :) Rummaged through some shirts @ Guess (I rarely go there but it was on 70% sale lol) but found nothing for me & sis :( even if we fitted :( aw. Nothing nice @ MNG as well. Wants the pink checkered blouse! P1850 :( *Thanks mom for having lots of vintage clothes. will experiment with them anyways :)


Speaking of vintageness my Penelope costume is cool! Formulated it myself. Love the outfit. So gypsy-ish. If I were going to a social formal event I would wear that (when I'm in my twenties/thirties lol) :))

Headed to Seattle's Best and bought this Chai Tea javakula which tasted like cola :( I conclude that I must only order Green tea frappes 'cause they taste sooo much better. Like the ones in Kozui/Starbuckssss <3 Full of calories :(

*is addicted to Caramel ensaymaditas. it was from Must Be Mom's. Yummy. imagine caramel sweetness w/ a sort of tart cheesy aftertaste. Yummy. Goodbye Krispy kreme :)) lol.


laptop low batt gtg.

xo!

ha-ha-ha-hyper.

I have so much things to do!
I'm gonna ditch dinner since I've gorged on pasta twice today. @ Barcelo and my aunt who (i didn't know) cooks awesome Carbonara.

So, I got a lot of things piled up for me for 2 free days and 1 night (tonight):
-including the fun ones. :D I'm up for fun all the timeeeee :>
*Thanks God only assignments are Calc & Hua Wen, but both are headaches*

• Look for Penelope costumes (it's harder than I thought!)
• Do Ms. Or Hau Lai's favor (draw animals etc)
• Look for old vintage SJCS pics (Filipino Proj)
• Update journal (COME ON!)
• Finish Vintage drawing (a bit more...!)
• Watch UP! Yessss. Tomorrow.
• Calculus. Study hard.
• Hua Wen. Memorize #3 4 Wen ta
• Study for UST. Math, Science.
  

Okay.
I'm dead x_X i cannot find any applicable costume for Penelope! Goodnessss :( I thought it was gonna be easy. Wah!

I gtg brb

xo.

what happened. [ i need more sleep! ]

I haven't updated much. Hahaha and I just didn't want to turn the laptop on. That's why. So far last week has been very...adjasefurvnuehwf. LOL.

08.13

• Experience 100 - before that I did nothing at home. Some guy rode with us to school, and it was really weird. I ran to the school gates. Hahaha.
• Masuki afterwards - w/ Ms. Aguilar & my cousins & relatives. (they happen to be close, don't ask me) went home late. 11:29 PM hitting the sack.
• Oh right I studied Algeb :>
  

08.14

• 6:00 AM rise and shine! Went w/ sibs to school, then Century, then S&R and walked w/ an empty stomach. So I munched on some Strawberry & Cheese Strudel while pushing the heavy cart (delish!) and bought some stuff, including pinstripe shorts & cool green PJs w/ a sheep design. lolness. Bought stuff for mooncake dice game the same night.
• Fetched sibs, aunt's house near school, lunch = binge (super. i will never do it again) and awesomely good green tea! xD I love it compared to my teabag ones lol. Aircon = bliss. Had an hour's worth of sleep. And drooling over the cute new zealand sheep stuff toy they had. LAWL. Wii Fit-ed for only running! And I was tired na. Ha ha.
• Night @ Hai Kang w/ old neighbors. Super fun. I missed the bonding when we were kids DASA lol. Den! Can't wait for another jam session x) See you soon Alyanna! Steff = nerd lol. xD Didn't win any money. Goodness. Next mooncake dice game : October w/ See Fam & Sy Fam. will hope for some cash >:)
• 11:30 PM hitting the sack.

08.15

• SUPER SLEEPY TO DEATH. I really wanted to lie in bed.
• So this day was very deadly to me. Oh, right, I got my UST Test Permit. And I'm so scared right now. I have to study. I literally yamned every period. Hahaha.
• So when I got home I slept from 6pm-9pm for the first time in my life! Then I woke up 9:30 and had dinner and headed to sleep 11PM. No studying haha.

08.16

• Which is why I'm prohibiting myself to go out today. I will remain and study. 10AM rise and shine. Breakfast? Leftover takeout pasta (OMG delish) Krispy kreme heated doughnuts is soooo good. (Karamel Kreme Krunch. hah. split w/ shob!) Cranberry Raisinets (mmm) and tea. It's 2 now and have not had lunch.
• Did Xiao Kai. Off to Hua Wen, Li Shr (I hate you) and Math = Geom, Trigo, Stats.
  

I REALLY need to study x(

xo.

waiting

"Waiting for this life to change,
Seems like it's taking me forever
And I can't hold on
This light is breaking into the day."
- Waiting, The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

I really like that song, but I can't find an HQ download for that mp3 so I haven't heard it for so long.

Anyways, I thought PT week ending was great, but I didn't realize the sorta aftermath I'd get with it. We've rechecked all PTs, except English, Filipino & Lishr *play horror sound!* which I'm very afraid to recheck. :|

Here are my awful results:

- okay not all are awful. happy w/ physics, math & hua wen because I was really dedicated in studying! xD LOL!
- lowest to highest

• EP - 72 (don't ask. i repeat. i studied but it didn't work.)
• Eco - 78 (still don't ask. i'm pretty careless & dislike memorizing economical stuff.)
• Calc - 79 (i knew it all along.)
• MAPEH -81 (watda.)
  
• Physics - 86 (8 hours of studying is pretty worth it.)
• Math - 90 (studying systematically & tutoring others is really effective.)
• TLE - 94 (i must really be connected to business. future entrepreneur xD)
• Chinese Language - 100 (almost everyone got 90+ bwahahaha.)

So much for the PT grades. I'm so not expecting for an honor, and it's shocking that all my low points are all minor. Watda? Oh wait I still have Filipino. Sure epic fail.

LOL. Today is a Thursday. Pretty free. Except I'm working my butt off with Algebra & Chinese and all those shinnanegans (is the spelling right? lol) and tomorrow is a free day wee! Except I have to attend this Experience 100 thing later which is an obligation for all 3rd & 4th year. And me being the secretary (this is getting boring) I have to get the attendance. Gah :<

Anyways I gtg. Am off to...idk. Eat?

Excited tomorrow!

• Maybe I'll go to S&R w/ mom. Buy mooncake stuff.
• And eat lunch @ SM Manila w/ my mom & bro.
• Have dinner @ Hai Kang w/ old friends & neighbors
• NO SCHOOL = BLISS :>

xo.

can you hear the loud silence?

Can you?

My topic today's probably not so related to the title. In fact, the only related thing there is the word
"silence", which is one word I really dislike.

Okay, so I'm usually quiet when I'm alone, but that only means I'm very contemplative when I'm alone. And I like observing stuff so, yeah lol. (FYI: I'm very much observant despite my 175-125 eyeglass grade) Anyways...

I find it awkward how talking may be so easy to do yet at times, you just can't get to spill the words out. Like a force of some sort is holding you back. I've probably closed vocal communications with a lot of people, and actually they just talk to me through words on paper (letters, notes, texts, chats etc) , which is really weird, for me. Oh well. Like I can change that :<>_<><) Calc 79. No honor. Great. Hmm...what else. Assignments are nowhere in sight today, except I'm tasked to write my course choices in the DLSU Form which is to be submitted tomorrow. I'm done answering; just the courses. I'll be getting (1) Business Management, (2) LIA-COM >> Organizational Communication & Business Management, and (3) I don't know yet. Maybe Applied Corporate Management.

Speaking of college, things are very complicated these days. There are so much activities & free days. Gad! So here's my calendar so far:

Click for full view :)

The calendar thing is so cool B-)

anyhoo, I'm out. This is a non-productive no assignment day for me. I should've drawn. Instead I went grocery shopping. I want to watch Teen Choice Awards & more JONAS eps :( And review? Ah well. Aw.

xo.

lay down your arms, give up the fight.

Oh I don't think so. I may feel very inferior most of the time but I'm so not in the mood of giving up.

I don't even know what's with the title, I just got LSS 'cause I just listened to "21 Guns" by Green Day lol. Oh, yeah, I also watched StoryLine which talked about Pres. Cory Aquino's life, which was interesting, and with a tie-in of Ninoy Aquino's life and death. Wow. Probably one reason I got distracted studying. Well I'm now on Chie Shr, which is vocabulary in Chinese. It's a lot but I'll hold on. I've got lots of mistakes in the Wen Ta & Fan I, but considering I spent yesterday foolishly doing nothing, the consequences come naturally.

Right now I'm once again procrastinating (although I feel like I'm not) by watching Wall-E (wait, am i?) and typing and Facebook-ing. Twitter kinda bores me now, or it's just because I have nothing to tweet about other than school stuff (oh, hello, here's the boring old me!) Anyways, i'm quite speechless today. I'm scared for tomorrow, since Tuesday will be the Physics Exam, and I'm afraid I have not been acquainted with Projectile Motion yet.

xo.

lolness:)

Just because I'm randomly bored, I'm posting this video.
I NEVER post videos, haha. Except this one, I guess? lol x)

Awarding of the YMCA thingy~

Note: I look like I'm such a good girl. Hahaha right.

xo~

i am myself again :)

Finally I have the luxury of time to actually go online and do some leisure time. Although I'm just bored xD I'm supposed to be studying!

Today's a pretty different day for me. Luckily the whole commotion of my probable mental disorder didn't push through today. God knows I'm really suffering with that so, I'm really happy. And! Well I got hit by a basketball this morning. On the head. By a bunch of grade school girls. Really, they pissed the hell of me off! I was having a good walk and then BAM! I thought my head would get dislocated of some sorts - haha I'm too crazy! But oh well!

Then I got in the classroom. Typical. Oh this was not typical: Taught Nicole Algebra for two hours straight. I honestly needed water lol. I also made this colorful outline thingy so I could appreciate Algebra. Probably I did these things 'cause I wanted to get over my Li Shr problem (not to mention Calculus as well, which will be the obvious reason for not getting honor this quarter) and start anew, and get over my depression! Which is obviously caused by extremely low grades & inferiority.

Moving on...Happy Birthday to people celebrating their birthdays today!

=x=

T-I-PROBABLY-WILL-DO:

• Finish my Vintage drawing w/c is long overdue!
• Formulate ideas for my new drawing w/c only consists of a vintage camera (chyeah, i love vintage!)
• Transfer pics from my PC to laptop (including pics from my recital 1 year ago!)
• Print the Huawen reviewer (will do this tomorrow)

T-I-SHOULD-DO-ASAP:

• STUDY. I just memorized two wentas xD oh, fine, two and a half :))

xo.

Will update when PTs are over. (tuesday)

Life Before Drama.

When everything was at its place.
I wish I could turn back the time.

May be?

Things are really hitting my hard on the gut.

These exams are killing me; and never in my life have I thought I'd get pissed with studying, but I am quite pissed at it. OR maybe it's because I don't sleep a lot and it's my low tech brain that's affecting my studying. Last year was probably more tolerable than this year. It's just the First Qtr. and I've got a 79 in Calculus, an 81 in MAPEH and what, low grades in Chinese. What's next? A failing grade in Math? Physics? English? Filipino?

It's really pissing me off. I don't even have enough time to rummage through my journal and paste some photos, write some thoughts, NONE. I'm holding my Chinese test papers now and trying to memorize Q & As but out of 10 I've only memorizes 3 since I got home around 1. I don't know what's wrong with me but it's really going to get my nerves.

And I had a mental breakdown awhile ago. I was really pissed. Watda...getting a 73 in Physics while all my other quizzes were 90+ makes me feel so degraded. Not so much about high grade obsession but I feel so effin dumb. I'm probably not dumb but careless. But still >:(

There are no classes tomorrow and I don't know whether I like it or not. Better not procrastinate or I'll be dead for good. I'm so sick of it.

xo.

sicknesses & excuses

I think there is something wrong with my life. I'm not sure what, but really, it's getting into my nerves. At this point I'm still very sleepy-ish, despite sleeping for 2 hours and not reading a summary of Odysseus and haven't studied Filipino except reading the book. Argh!

If there's no drama in my personal life, there's drama at home. (well at least now no more)
If I get to bond w/ my best friends, lots of people barge in and we get separated again
If my drawing is right there staring at me, waiting for some paint, I can't do anything but stare back. I'm too busy.
If I feel good it gets out of my body as fast as possible.
If my brain is not rationally working a lot, a lot of assignments pile up again.

What the hell is wrong with me?

I can't possibly find a way to escape to this, but it's really awful. I just want to sleep right now.

xo.

thankyou:)

11,111 PVs rock! Thank you for all the supportive fellow dA people :) I'm happy for that :) and motivated to do more art when I have time, hopefully :)

[the HS group winners]
[was the only one not wearing uniform xD]

Okay. I badly need to go. Hooray for internet again! Got the DLSU Form today, lol.

xo.

~ R.I.P. Ex Pres Cory Aquino ~

Impression vs. Expression

When it comes to art, these two are very diverse forms.

But I'm not going to describe impressionist vs. expressionist art; I don't even know a lot about those stuff. lol xD

Anyways...schoolwork has been doing its effort to kill my time, really. It sucks, and what sucks more is a sure notion that I will get a ultra-low grade in the Calculus Exam (wait, was that an exam? I'd say it's hell gone mad) and a whole lot more commotion in our household.

I'd rather not talk about that...it was awful ><

Moving on...I got 5th place in YMCA. Yay much? Really, my face was just blank, but, I'm happy, the least...awkward. So awhile ago was the awarding. I didn't even know; my mom had to call Saint Jude before we knew (hence, SJCS NEVER supports me - factual!) and so yeah, today - awhile ago 9AM we had the exhibit + awarding + oh, let me mention the criticism of my work (why it was 5th and not 3rd, according to the Art Director of YMCA who happens to like criticizing my work over & over) awhile ago, plus an art demo from an artist who was really good and did some impressionistic art of a flower arrangement.


Shots~

[why is the school still stated? lol]

[the critic said I was an "amateur" for using BLACK. uhh, let me correct, I used BROWN, and the bottom "leaf" happened to turn out bad; and he said I need LIGHT >> oh, trust me I'm so looking for the light...watda...it's not my fault I'm not good in painting!]

[to all the winners, congrats!]

[the artist did this using felt & oil pastels; for 30 minutes only, one the spot. he's good!]

Okay I gtg.

I think I wish I wore my uniform. haha 'cause everyone did except SJ people xD But I don't want to anyways.

GTG :<

So much for a short entry :| I wasn't even able to cite why my title was that!

xo. I gtg. I hate PLDT, remember that.